HI there, dear!
It’s common for people to say only the parts of the truth that they feel are acceptable or that they think people want to hear, leaving the full truth hidden away. They may lie by omission or tell ‘little white lies’ that paint a very different picture of reality. Even lies told in the name of protecting others can leave you feel pretty bad about yourself, because you don’t feel like an authentic, strong individual when you aren’t being honest. There’s different ways people tell lies to someone else. There’s controlling a response, lying by omission, exaggerations, self protection, gossip or covert communication.
Those little white lies people tell everyday aren’t very harmful and I’m sure every single person does it. Things like, “How do I look?” You think that they look horrible but you say, “You look fantastic!” White lies smooth life bcause brutal frankness and long term friendships don’t mix well. Compulsive and purposeful lying is a horrible thing to do. This is the kind of lying that you get tangled up in and create big elaborate stories to back up this lie. There are many reasons why someone might lie. Because they behave badly but want to still ‘look good’, to genuinely save someone else’s feelings, to control other people, for self-aggrandizement in order to make themselves appear wonderful, and through sheer force of habit.
Remember the truth is often easier. Mark Twain said, “Always tell the truth. That way, you don’t have to remember what you said.” Lying can be a real strain. You have to remember so muh and no matter how elaborate your twisting and turning, you’ll eventually slip up.
Know what lying is. It’s so easy to lie to ourselves what what lying is. Not telling the truth and remaining silent is lying through omission. In the same way, people may assume that failing to do the right thing is not the same as doing the wrong thing. Don’t make excuses for yourself. Not telling the truth when you know what it is, is lying.
Start telling small truths. Being honest here and there when you normally wouldn’t. Bit by bit just start telling the truth. For example, if you usually lie about what you went to school for, when someone asks tell them the truth.
I hope this helps, dear.
Lots of love,
-Ally